- Posted by Theresa on September 18th, 2006 filed in Believe It or Not

- I’m normally not a praying man, but if you’re up there, please save me Superman.
- I’m having the best day of my life, and I owe it all to not going to Church!
- Lisa, if the Bible has taught us nothing else, and it hasn’t, it’s that girls should stick to girls sports, such as hot oil wrestling and foxy boxing and such and such.
- I’m not a bad guy! I work hard, and I love my kids. So why should I spend half my Sunday hearing about how I’m going to Hell?
- I’ve always wondered if there was a god. And now I know there is — and it’s me.
- But Marge, what if we chose the wrong religion? Each week we just make God madder and madder.
- Dear Lord.. The gods have been good to me. For the first time in my life, everything is absolutely perfect just the way it is. So here’s the deal: You freeze everything the way it is, and I won’t ask for anything more. If that is OK, please give me absolutely no sign. OK, deal.
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