Frasch Ideas—Examine, Inquire, Explore

Talking to Yourself

• Posted by Theresa on February 21st, 2006 filed in Anything Goes

“Self-acceptance is my refusal to be in an adversarial relationship to myself.” –

Nathaniel Branden

*** QUESTION YOUR LIFE ***

How do you usually talk to yourself?

*** COACH’S TIP ***

Our thoughts create our reality. How do you typically think about yourself? Do you berate yourself for being stupid, sloppy, forgetful or insensitive? Or do you watch yourself with interest, respect and compassion? Stay alert to your self-talk and let go of judgments that don’t serve you.

*** INSPIRATION ***

“The universe never says no to your thought about yourself. It only grows it.” –

Neale Donald Walsch

Pasted from Smart Questions.

My Answer:

How I talk to myself depends on my state of mind. One of the reasons I sought medical help for depression was because of my self-talk. A book I was reading asked me to examine how I talked to myself and these were the phrases that were constantly running through my mind:

• you are so stupid
• why do you always do that
• stupid idiot
• you are such a loser
• you can’t do anything right
• crybaby
• wimp/weenie
• why don’t you just shut up
• nobody likes a whiner
• nobody really likes you

I realized I couldn’t find anything good to say about myself. Even if somebody combatted my self-talk, I couldn’t believe them. I felt like the lowest loser.

I have a comic strip (Life in Hell by Matt Groening) hanging on my wall that I cut out because it said it all.

Guy A says:

“I’m stupid.”

“I’m clumsy.”

“I’m troubled.”

“I’m wimpy.”

“I’m lazy.”

“I’m untalented.”

“I’m a loser.”

“Is there anything I’m good at?”

Guy B says:

“Well, you have a way with words.”

One of these days I will be able to take that off my wall. I won’t throw it away, though. I will keep it as a reminder of how it was.