Goal-Free Living

If you know anything about me you know I have a book wherever I am - even one stashed away in the bathroom at work! I was reading a bit of that one yesterday (Tom Peter’s The Pursuit of Wow) and he said something that caught my attention and made me ponder the idea of life without goals.

His thoughts were that we should have a vision - a flexible one, but not pursue one thing to the exclusion of everything else. He said that when opportunities come our way and we ignore them because they are not in line with our goals, then our goals become blinders, severely limiting our vision.

As I think about this it gives me a sense of freedom, of wonder, of possibility…

I said in a previous post that one of the ways I will know I am no longer depressed is when I can become goal oriented again. I have always had goals…but lately I have been so disappointed - in myself, in my lack of accomplishment, in my failures. Maybe I will give myself the freedom to let go of my goals and to focus on my vision and to let it lead me where it will:

“I have a life filled with creativity, writing, learning, teaching, and motivation; a life filled with love, laughter, and wellness; with plenty of time for solitude and plenty of time for friends and family.”

I was looking to see if there was any other information I could find from Tom Peters and I found this interview he did with Steven Shapiro about Steven’s book Goal-Free Living.


tompeters.com asks …

Hi, Steve. What is Goal-Free Living?

SS:

Goal-Free Living is the antidote to our achievement-oriented society. Basically since birth, we’ve been taught that we should be setting and achieving goals, and working hard toward goals. And for some people, that works. Some people enjoy a goal-oriented life. But for many people, all that does is create stress and dissatisfaction.

I’ve done a number of surveys on the relationship between people’s goals and their happiness. What I’ve found is that most people keep sacrificing “today” for “tomorrow.” They’ll set a goal, plan it out, work hard, achieve the goal, and then say, “Okay, that was great; what’s next?” They’re constantly striving to achieve these goals in the belief that life’s going to get better.

Goal-Free Living, quite simply, is having a powerful future that is a context for how you live your life today. That is, you get satisfaction today instead of achieving it in the future…

So you really have to step back and look at your life. One of the challenges of being goal-oriented is that you set this target and get myopically focused on it. You block out everything else, and you move forward, pushing through obstacles. The Old English origin of the word “goal” comes from “obstacle, hindrance or barrier.” So it’s really pushing hard.

What I’m trying to do is create a future that pulls you forward instead of requiring all that pushing…

“Use a compass, not a map.” By that I mean, “Have a sense of direction-not a destination-and then set sail without plans. Life is not static, so your priorities are going to change and evolve as you evolve.”

My suggestion is that we should have a sense of direction and let life unfold naturally, rather than trying to force it down a particular path, which is what we typically try to do. This will allow you to have a much more experiential view of life, allowing life to come to you. You will meander and weave, and change direction as you find the things you’re really passionate about…

So you’re not making any value judgments about people based on whether or not they can succeed in a goal-free environment?

SS:

No, not at all. I do say there’s a difference between being goal-free and goal-less. I’m definitely not an advocate of being goal-less, which is being lost and directionless, and sitting on your butt eating bon-bons, watching Jerry Springer. To me, goal-free is moving forward through life with purpose and passion, but not knowing how it’s going to turn out. And not caring how it turns out, I guess, is probably even more important…

To me, goal-oriented means you move forward with plans toward a specific target. Goal-free means you still have a sense of direction, but it’s completely unplanned, unpredictable, with detours left and right. You’re experiencing all that life has to offer, and changing direction whenever it seems appropriate…

So I like to say that if you live a goal-free existence, you can never fail.

Although there’s a lot to be said for failure.

SS: It’s-well-

What, do you think failure’s overrated?

SS:

I guess it depends on how you define failure. To me, I just view everything as an experience. We label it “failure” or “success,” when in fact it’s just an experience. And we can learn from every experience-good, bad, or indifferent…

And that takes me back to the “use a compass, not a map” metaphor. Maps are really useful for getting from point A to point B as efficiently and quickly as possible. But life isn’t about efficiency, and it’s not about effectiveness. Life is about exuberance and passion and joy, and you can’t map that out. You really can only experience it.

If we don’t label experiences as successes or failures, we won’t worry about making new decisions. You know, there’s this concept of “decidophobia.” People have a fear of making decisions, because they think it’s a lifetime choice. But it really isn’t; it’s just another decision. You move down that path, but you can change direction. So I really don’t feel I’ve ever, ever failed. I’ve had things that may not have gone as planned, but since I’m detached from the outcome, that’s fine too.


I think I will have to make a trip to Barnes and Nobel today and take a look at his book…it sounds interesting and might be just what I need. It is so different from what I have been taught and what I have done. I feel a certain freedom just thinking about the possibilities.

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