I am going to take a break from blogging for awhile, though. I feel like I don’t have anything new to add and it takes a lot of time to come up with something if it is not right there at the top of my head. I’ll probably be back sooner or later, so keep me in mind.

I am going to take some time to work on my photo scrapbooks and learn Spanish. Spring is here and summer is not too far away. Baseball season opens today (drat! I have to work right through the first game). I love summer and being outdoors. It is my favorite time of year.

Thanks for reading along with me and commenting over the years. I’ve met some neat people through my blog. Bye for now.

Theresa

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Let’s look again at Dr. Joy Browne’s article in the Parade Magazine on How to Set Goals - and Reach Them.

We need to periodically review our goals to make sure that they are still something that is truly important to us. Also, re-evaluation gives us a sense of direction and progress. If we continually see no progress…it is definitely time to take another look at that goal. Do you still want it? Do you want it bad enough to do something about it? If it no longer applies to you, get rid of it.

How about making new goals? Is there a secret? Here is what Dr. Joy Browne says:

Avoid New Year’s-type resolutions. Set personal goals according to your own internal timetable and steer clear of the type of goals traditionally made at the start of the year. You know the ones I am talking about: lose weight, stop smoking, spend more time with the family, get fit. They’re ubiquitous. I call them “pity party favors,” since these recurring unmet goals focus exclusively on the negative and only make us feel lousy. They become a part of the baggage that we all carry around. Speaking of which, if you’ve had the same well-defined, time delineated goal for years, something’s not working. Toss it or redefine it.

She also says Be Specific, Think in Steps, and Figure Out Your Tactics. Pretty common goal setting stuff. Then she adds three more points that I really appreciated:

Limit Their Number - she says tackling more than one goal at a time is foolhardy. Most goals are going to be composed of smaller achievable goals.

Build on Your Skills - she says that if you want to develop a brand new expertise, consider what other previously unknown skill you were able to master.

Embrace Change - she reminds us that the world changes and we are not the same people we once were. Our goals remind us of what we dare (or dared) to wish for. They are milestones by which we assess our growth, progress and transformations.

And just to keep things balanced, let’s take one more look at Goal-Free Living: How to Have the Life You Want NOW! Author Stephen Shapiro says:

A few years ago, I uncovered a startling secret. After traveling the world and interviewing hundreds of people, I discovered that the most creative, passionate, and successful people were NOT goal-oriented.

Yes, I realize this runs counter to everything that you have been taught. But it’s true. Let me explain.

When you are consumed by your goals, you focus on the future rather than being present to what is around you. Life seems like a sacrifice. You become stressed as you work hard toward your goals. As a result, you rarely perform your best (there’s a reason why 92% of New Years Resolutions fail). Life doesn’t flow effortlessly. And to make matters worse, because you are so focused on your future goals, you often miss “hidden” opportunities that would bring you even greater success and happiness.

Goal-Free Living presents an alternative philosophy: You can create true success in all aspects of your life - career, relationships, sales, parenting, and more - with less effort and without the burden of goals and plans.

I think they both have something to offer us. Remember, the key is balance and openness to what life has to offer you right here and right now. What do you think?

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A few years ago I worked in Silverdale and had 60 minute commute each way. Dr. Laura came on right after the other program I listened to but I couldn’t stand her. She’d make me so mad because she didn’t listen to her callers and jumped in with her legalistic viewpoint on what she thought they were going to say. I’d find myself arriving to work angry and frustrated. I started searching the dial for another show. That’s when I found Dr. Joy Browne.

She was so much better than Dr. Laura. She listened to the callers and offered real advice, not some canned commentary. I found myself in a much better mood when I arrived to work. Sometimes I had to force myself to go into work because she was right in the middle of something good.

I ran into an article by her in last Sunday’s Parade Magazine: How to Set Goals - and Reach Them. What she had to say was a confirmation of the way I view setting goals now, which is different than how I used to see them.

Goals are a manifestation of our dreams, our priorities and our value systems, all of which shift with time. Yet it is surprising how often we allow goals to become carved in stone.

That’s because, even as the value of a certain goal diminishes, the urgency and the yearning associated with them remain.

Emotional resources can be squandered by holding onto goals that are no longer meaningful or even counter-productive to the life you actually lead.

I was doing that for awhile, until I read Goal-Free Living by Stephen Shapiro. I learned that it was okay to move on and change your mind about what seemed important back then.

Goals need to be periodically re-evaluated. Ask yourself - Is this still important? Do I still want it? Am I still willing to go for it?

Throw away the ones that are no longer valid for you. It is okay. Set new ones, this is okay, too.

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1. Have a forgiving view of events and people. Accept the fact that we live in an imperfect world.

2. Have an optimistic view of the world. Believe that most people are doing the best they can.

3. Take care of the todays as best you can and the yesterdays and the tomorrows will take care of themselves.

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1. Say “No!” Saying “no” to extra projects, social activities, and invitations you know you don’t have the time or energy for takes practice, self-respect, and a belief that everyone, everyday, needs quiet time to relax and be alone.

2. Unplug your phone. Want to take a long bath, meditate, sleep, or read without interruption? Drum up the courage to temporarily disconnect. (The possibility of there being a terrible emergency in the next hour or so is almost nil.) Or use an answering machine.

3. Allow yourself time - everyday - for privacy, quiet, and introspection.

4. Every day, do something you really enjoy.

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An atheist was walking through the woods.
“What majestic trees! “What powerful rivers! “What beautiful animals!” he said to himself.

As he was walking alongside the river, he heard a rustling in the bushes behind him. He turned to look. He saw a 7-foot grizzly charge toward him. He ran as fast as he could up the path. He looked over his shoulder and saw that the bear was closing in on him.

He looked over his shoulder again, and the bear was even closer. He tripped and fell on the ground. He rolled over to pick himself up but saw that the bear was right on top of him, reaching for him with his left paw and raising his right paw to strike him. At that instant the Atheist cried out, “Oh my God!”

Time Stopped.

The bear froze.

The forest was silent.

As a bright light shone upon the man, a voice came out of the sky. “You deny My existence for all these years, teach others I don’t exist and even credit creation to cosmic accident.” Do you expect Me to help you out of this predicament? Am I to count you as a believer?”

The atheist looked directly into the light, “It would be hypocritical of me to suddenly ask You to treat me as a Christian now, but perhaps You could make the bear a Christian?”

“Very well,” said the voice.

The light went out. The sounds of the forest resumed. And the bear dropped his right paw, brought both paws together, bowed his head and spoke: “Lord, bless this food, which I am about to receive from thy bounty, through Christ our Lord, Amen.”

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1. Do nothing which, after being done, leads you to tell a lie.

2. Learn to live one day at a time.

3. Every day, do something you really enjoy.

4. Writing your thoughts and feelings down (in a journal, or on paper to be thrown away) can help you clarify things and can give you a renewed perspective

5. Add an ounce of love to everything you do.

6. Do something for somebody else.

7. Focus on understanding rather than on being understood; on loving rather than on being loved.

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1. Practice preventive maintenance. Your car, appliances, home, and relationships will be less likely to break down/fall apart “at the worst possible moment.”

2. Be prepared to wait. A paperback can make a wait in a post office line almost pleasant.

3. Procrastination is stressful. Whatever you want to do tomorrow, do today; whatever you want to do today, do it now.

4. Plan ahead. Don’t let the gas tank get below one-quarter full; keep a well-stocked “emergency shelf” of home staples; don’t wait until you’re down to your last bus token or postage stamp to buy more; etc.

5. Don’t put up with something that doesn’t work right. If your alarm clock, wallet, shoe laces, windshield wipers - whatever- are a constant aggravation, get them fixed or get new ones.

6. Create order out of chaos. Organize your home and workspace so that you always know exactly where things are. Put things away where they belong and you won’t have to go through the stress of losing things.

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1. Get up fifteen minutes earlier in the morning. The inevitable morning mishaps will be less stressful.

2. Prepare for the morning the evening before. Set the breakfast table, make lunches, put out the clothes you plan to wear, etc.

3. Don’t rely on your memory. Write down appointment times, when to pick up the laundry, when library books are due, etc.

4. Allow 15 minutes of extra time to get to appointments. Plan to arrive at an airport one hour before domestic departures.

5. Schedule a realistic day. Avoid the tendency to schedule back-to-back appointments; allow time between appointments for a breathing spell.

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What is a Bright? Here is an article from the Columbia Missourian that gives a good overview.

• They are but a small minority, making up less than 5 percent of the U.S. population.
• An international movement whose members reject the existence of or belief in “supernatural and mystical elements.” Brights possess what they call a “naturalistic” world view, which attributes everything that exists to the laws of science and nature.
• The whole point of the Brights is… we can explain the natural world without invoking necessarily supernatural explanations.”
• The group doesn’t subscribe to the atheist label.
• “Bright” incorporates an entire world view. “You don’t define yourself by the things you don’t believe in.”
• You believe this is the only life you’re going to get. It’s a precious life. It’s a beautiful life. It’s something that we should live to the full, to the end of our days …it frees you up to live this life properly, happily, and fully.
• We (naturalists) really aren’t monsters. We love this world. We love people.”

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